The Art of Babyfare
What does SUN-TZU and Babies have in common...?
At first, you may think the art of warfare and fatherhood have NOTHING in common. Oh, how wrong and uninformed you would be in that assumption!
The baby has finally arrived and now it’s no longer just the two of you. Suddenly, the baby and mommy are the focus of attention. Well, that’s how it should be it’s just a fact of life. It is a bit funny how the father tends to be overlooked, but embrace that neglect and use it as a strategic advantage (see what I mean later). Yes, you kind of feel a little left out, but you become the master behind the scene.
It’s critical the family makes decisions in the best interest of the new baby. Who usually knows what is best for baby – yes mom. However, the new mom will face many challenges with the baby and her body (recovery from child birth) in the first few weeks. She does not need to be bothered with baby visits, taking out garbage, making dinner, etc… Your job is to make sure your partner is rested and taken care of so she can focus on the new baby. You know your partner and they will need plenty of support physically and emotionally in the first few weeks.
“HE WHO KNOWS THE ENEMY AND HIMSELF WILL NEVER IN A HUNDRED BATTLES BE AT RISK” – SUT-TZU
He who knows himself?
In this context I believe your role, as a new father is to protect and nurture the one who is take care of the newborn.
He who knows the enemy?
In context of a new father, the enemies are those who are not allowing the caregiver of the newborn to be their best caring for the baby.
Perfect example, new baby arrives home and mom is exhausted and recovering from delivery. The extended family and friends are ready to rip down doors to see the baby. Your job is to assess the mood and condition of the new mom and take action. So, you don’t need Uncle Fred pestering you or your partner about where the good booze is and why there is no food around for him.
Don’t be afraid to tell family or close friends that YOU will call them when things settle. If that is not an option, then limit the visits for maybe an hour and schedule the visit when it’s best for the new mom and baby.
Remember the stars of the show are mom and baby, but it’s our jobs as new fathers to ensure the health and well being of the new mom and baby. So don’t be afraid to use your voice.
Posted on Tuesday, February 19th, 2008 at 4:11 am.
Filed under Daddy Blog.
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